When Disappointment Comes To The Couple
Disappointment can be a turning point in the couple, since it can help us to define if it is worth fighting for or if the relationship should reach its final point.
Disappointment doesn’t come overnight. When we have been with a partner for many years, the days can become routine.
However, sometimes we roll over in bed, look at the person next to us and wonder if they are the one. The feeling of attraction from the beginning has worn off and disappointment has worked its way into the relationship.
It is normal that you feel that you have taken a “disappointment” when you have spent a considerable time with that person who, until days ago, you considered your “better half”.
Do not worry. Idealization has been pushed aside to make way for reality.
During the first days, even years, your partner is perfect. It has almost no flaws and everything is wonderful. However, this changes.
Before making a hasty decision, think about it. It is your perception that has been modified, not the course of things. Your relationship is the same as a few months and a few years ago. Simply, the way you see it is different.
Disappointment has opened my eyes
The reason for your disappointment is that your partner is no longer the only reason for your happiness. You think that this is negative, that it no longer gives you anything. You’re wrong. You have simply matured.
Many of our beliefs regarding love or infatuation are misleading. For example, we leave our happiness in the hands of the other in an act of “submission.” We think this proves our affection. We do not realize that we are facing an error.
In any union, the two members complement each other, but are not subordinate to each other. They are both free, happy for themselves. At the moment when this is not the case, we speak of dependency.
These types of relationships that we consider “correct” are the most harmful, but we are not aware of it.
Sooner or later disappointment arises, but not because that person is no longer the right person. A path to mature love has been made.
Mature love
Mature love arises when all those butterflies in the stomach have been left behind, that constant need to know everything about the other.
Now the routine is present in your lives, you know each other well enough. If you find yourself at this moment in which disenchantment has made an appearance, it is important that you open your eyes to realize two things:
- If that person is really the right one. The butterflies in the stomach may have caused you to “hook” on someone who is not complementary to you. What tastes and interests do you share? Do you have the same vision of the world?
- If you are thinking with a consumer mindset. Now that you don’t like him so much, or that you don’t feel like at the beginning of the relationship, you think about leaving your partner and having the opportunity with another.
- Beware of this option. There is no right person, it is about becoming the right person.
Grow together, walk hand in hand
There may be many people with whom you can start a healthy relationship. But how many of them will become your complement, your life partner?
You are different. However, you have decided to share your existence. To grow together, it is your responsibility to think now about a common good, without neglecting your individuality. Even when disappointment makes an appearance.
Have you told your partner how you perceive her now? Or have you chosen to shut up and put an end to yours? Express what you feel. It’s your support, who you supposedly trust. It is your job to get through this together.
If the two of you have realized that the relationship has taken a new step, it is time for you to change those motivations and actions that had worked so far.
Take a new twist, fresh air. Links are transformed, just like people. We are not always going to be the same and this is positive. Change and progress will always mean progress.
Conclution
Disappointment is the first step that can lead us to mature love or a breakup. You decide where you want to go.
Regardless of your decision, try to be respectful and remember that relationships do not have to be ideal or perfect. This is a false belief.
